And that's enough. I have only the systems assignment left to finish, but that will be for tonight. I had a unexpected assignment added to the pile which I finished just now. Ahh...time to relax, almost, I keep forgetting about systems. I can't wait for the end!!!

On another note, I made it to class this morning. I was late, but I was there. That's what really counts, right?

The countdown is on. Home in 48 hours. Gotta get stuff done. I have to finish the fluids assignment by the time I go to bed. I have to finish the systems assignment by three o'clock tomorrow, and then I'm going to the gym with Mel, after which I will come up the hill, have supper and pack. Then Friday, it's to class and home. Key element being, I've decided to give up skipping classes for lent. Something tells me this could be a bit of a challenge. Help me?

Everyday, Evan and I ask each other how far we've gotten in our assignments, looking for reasurance that we're no farther behind. We're always both afraid to answer each other. Everyday we find out that we're each no farther ahead than the other. It's sad how we cling to the fact that if one of us is getting by, the other will get by.

Well, here I am, back at my old tricks. It's one thirty in the morning. I'm working on a lab report that was due at four thirty this afternoon. B's gone to bed and I am alone. It's a good long time since I've done this; it makes me reminisce about high school and first year of university, the days when I would come home after cadets or skiing and sit down to do my homework. I have to keep at it if I ever want to get to bed, but I'm not doing a fantastic job. I need a shot of go juice.

Ha!

If men had PMS, what would happen?

a) The federal government would allocate funds to study it.
b) Cramps would become an acceptable reason to apply for permanent
disability.
c) There would be a federal holiday every 28 days.
d) All of the above.

- B's random joke generator.

Rah! The computer world doesn't want me to get to talk to Mom :( Everytime I come online she's gone. I just tried to send her an email and the unb server is down. Then I tried to use hotmail, and the webpage made ie crash twice. Blarg! I wonder if I can remember my hello kitty password...

I can't decide whether or not to feel accomplished today. I got the Thermo Lab report done, but it isn't due until Wednesday morning. I still have to write a Fluids Lab report that is due tomorrow at 4PM or so. I'm not a very well organized person. Damn group work! That's right, I'm blaming group work, the classic excuse. Just to clarify, the Thermo report is a group report. One bonus to today: Melanie and I made tentative plans to go to the gym Thursday afternoon. Good God, it's been too long since I've been to the gym.

Long time no post. Or at least it feels like it; I've been a busy girl. So busy that B and I decided to make last Thursday night a no work night. He had three midterms that day and I had one grueling one too. We came up after class, and Jenn and B and I made a yummy dinner of penne in a chunky vegetable meat sauce with breadsticks. Mmm mmm good. Then we sat in bed with our full bellies and watched two movies. We managed to do all this by 10:30PM and still get a good night's sleep.

On Friday night, we had the first girls’ night out of the year. We had about a 50% turnout; seven out of the fourteen or so Mech. girls showed up. We went for dinner at the Snooty Fox and I totally pigged out, yay for real food! The plan was to go back to Colleen's and get our drink on before hitting the bars. Well, we made it to Colleen's. After a few rounds of asshole, I started a buzz to go sledding. Instead of heading to the bar, the bunch of us ended up pulling on snow pants/rain gear and snatching some trays from the caf. to use as our high tech sleds. What a night, I had a great time. I'll have to get off my ass and organize something else.

B also had quite a night. It turns out he found some guys to go to trivia. Well, not only did they go to trivia, but stayed out the rest of the night too. The two of us arrived home some time after 2:30AM drunk off our asses. We provided a little entertainment for Jenn, arguing about the pronunciation of draught. The best part is that we didn't drag ourselves out of bed until 4:30PM on Saturday. We got up, ate supper, did some work, went for groceries, got some Subway, watched a movie, and were falling asleep again at midnight.

That's what I call an excellent weekend. (Leaving out the huge fight I started on Thursday night.)

Another instance of sailing and skiing teaming up! That's a link by the way, since I'm a bitch and made my links the same color as my text.

I feel like throwing my books, my computer, and at times tonight even my B through the big fucking window beside me.

Work is kicking me in the bum. "Ow work!" I say. Work doesn't listen. Work continues to kick me in the bum and refuses to listen. Work is behaving like a two year old. It makes me want to behave like a two year old. I want to say, "Work, go fuck yourself." A little voice is telling me that that would be inappropriate.

I know exactly where I want to be right now. I want to be spending my days working maybe two nights a week bartending, while spending my days cleaning and painting our house and dads, all the while working at getting back into shape. I want to have no more stresses about having to get things done by a certain time, only to be somewhere at a certain time. I'm loving life, but every once in a while I remember that I'm supposed to have the things I'm "working" on done in the next twenty-four hours.

Work blows. I was supposed to do two lab reports this weekend, along with a progress report on the progress that we have not made on our design project. So far I've gotten most of one lab report done, and I'm supposed to meet my design group tomorrow so we can compile the progress report. Fuck, fucking crap.

I just had a wonderful day with B. (After shooting my mouth off and getting in trouble last night.) We went for groceries, and poked our noses in to Wicker Emporium for a minute. They had sweet little pillow cases with sailboats embroidered on them for $4. I got two, and then two other silky looking ones to match. Yay pillows for my chairs :D

"Silence isn't golden. It's pure white, powdery and endless." -- Susan Salter Reynolds, Los Angeles Times.

Caught in the act: I feel as though it is my responsibility to keep up with my work, and study hard. It is when I am supposed to be hard at work, that I have the most trouble staying focused.

On a completely different note, I just came an incredible realisation. I love to ski because of its intimate nature. Alone in the woods you have no concerns and no fears. The sun or moonlight reflect gloriously off the snow. Trees all around protect you from the breeze. All is still. You are the only thing flying by. It is solitude. No one is there to criticise you, no one is there to encourage you. You are alone, and in control.

It is this that I love about skiing, and it is this that steers me away from team practices and friendly outings. The sport is an outlet. It is this that has me prefer the half an hour walk as opposed to getting a drive to the trails.

"Oh what a night!" ...Nothing feels better than getting the blood flowing. Tomorrow will be a brighter day.

Today is my disorganized day. I started by shutting off the snooze because I thought we were awake, apparently we fell back to sleep. We still made it to our respective second classes. I got to class and pulled out my books, it took me about ten minutes to clue in that I had the wrong Fluids book sitting in front of me. So stunned! That also meant that I don't have my text book so that I can work on my assignment, hence I'm sitting here "wasting" time instead. It's all go, I excel at "wasting" time.

Is there anything that can brighten one's day like a good old fashioned gesture? I am always thrilled to get a little note via snail mail, perhaps I haven't been as religious with responding as I should be...my apologies. Remember, I still love you! I'm just a little pokey sometimes. Speaking of pokey, I have homework that's calling my name, and a little cousin who deserves a good old fashioned letter.

After a two and a half hour nap last night I dragged B out to the bar. Our house was having a fundraiser at a local bar last night; cover and 10% of sales went to the Canadian Council for the Blind. It's awhile since I had gone out and gotten my drink on. I had a damn good time. We got back around a quarter to two, and stuffed our faces.

I woke up this morning at eight-thirty, I'm so proud of myself for that. A little on the tipsy side...I got right to work, even if it didn't last long. How is it that I still managed to spend half of the day talking to support staff at Hewlett Packard? I had a great nap this afternoon too, and after a little more real work it's time to go watch Wind, I've been having a craving.

After a week of short nights I have become delirious...

I am zonked. I have a lab report that was due on Monday that still hasn't been handed in yet, but since then I've been staying on top of things better than usual.

Spring is in the air...it's everywhere I look around...I love days like this when it's sunny and warm and happy outside. Can we please have some more days like today?

I'm back at school thinking about how impossible it is to figure my life out. I also think about why I would even bother to try and figure things out. I waste more time trying to understand why than I do simply living. I sit in my room waiting for something to happen. I should be working on this and that, particularly that which will have to be finished before I can sleep tonight, rather I am sitting here like the kid I wish I still were posting on a blog and listening to punk music...I spend my life in an argument with who I am supposed to be. For every step I take toward my future, I long to take two steps back into the carefree days when going to school meant going to school, before going to school meant growing up and being professional. I never quite know when it is that I was satisfied with where I was. The thought crosses my mind that I'd be happy frozen in time last winter, at that point things were making sense without being overbearing. I liked that place where I knew who I was as a child without making the next unpleasant step. I fear that I've had my chance to do whatever it is that I may want to do, and now I'm left with what I have to do.