The mind is a wonderous thing. Mine is brimming with thoughts. I spent last night alone. I haven't done that in awhile. Most of my life I have cherished the copious amounts of time I spent alone. Last night however I didn't know what to think of it. For a fair chunk of time now, I have had someone I knew would want to spend time with me and I with them. No matter what, I was rarely alone. I'd grown accustomed to having a close friend by my side. I've come to enjoy spending my "alone" time with someone else.
While I went about my activities (gel coat work on the canoe) last night, I thought about my feeling of heading back to a previous time in my life. I've come to realize that it's a feeling that comes from within me. I was a very emotional child; for the past few years, I had not shed a tear. A little over two months ago, the flood gates were opened once more. I think I had developped an attitude that I was invincible. I'm not. Now I feel vulnerable. I am allowing myself to feel vulnerable. I need to get back my confidence. I need to stop the tears.