I hate certain aspects of my life with a distinct passion. Why can't things be simple. I make one request. I'm told it's no problem at all. For some unknown reason it seems that simple request just won't be met. I want to quit. I don't know how. I can't afford to learn. I hate that this turns my stomach. It's rediculous the way I let things affect me. I don't know what to do.

I've lost the ability to deal with my life the way I used to. Although I wonder if I ever let myself live my life before. I don't like the way things are. Maybe I'm too sensitive. I feel like I've become a door mat. Now that people have passed through the door, I've become ignored. When I'm no longer needed I'm cast aside.

I don't want to be misinturpreted. I'm endlessly greatful to those who have shown me such unconditional love. Perhaps I need to learn to be happy with what I've got in this moment.